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DragonCon prep: a montage

21 Aug

When the hour’s approaching to give it your best, and you’ve got to reach your prime

hour approaching

That’s when you need to put yourself to the test


and show us the passage of time

show us the passing of time

We’re gonna need a montage! Ooh, it takes a montage!


Show a lot of things happening at once

Remind everyone of what’s going on!
remind everyone of what's going on

With every shot show a little improvement

To show it all would take too long

to show it all would take too long

That’s called a montage!


Oooh, we want a montage!


In anything, if you want to go from just a beginner


to a pro


You need a montage! Even Rocky had a montage!


Always fade out in a montage…


If you fade out it seems like more time has passed in a montage…



Announcing the Fabulous Costume Movie Madness Tournament of Champions!

1 Mar

If you’re into sports, or hang out with someone who is, or if you’ve ever stepped into a bar in the US or turned on a TV in the spring, you may be aware of this little thing called March Madness. You know, the basketball tournament with the brackety thing?

You may insert your favorite teams as desired

Yes, that!

Being 6′ tall since the age of 12, I was strong-armed into playing basketball for two miserable, embarrassing seasons (I was very bad at it), and since nothing it sexier than clinging to childhood trauma, I still harbor deep resentment for the sport and all its trappings. That doesn’t mean I can’t use its trappings to my own end, though! And with that in mind…

“What Is This I Can’t Even” and stone biscuit productions are pleased to bring you

The Fabulous Costume Movie Madness Tournament of Champions

What is it? A tournament-style…uh, tournament, where I post a lot of pretty pictures and readers vote for their favorite fabulously-costumed movie to become Champion of Champions!

What movies will be involved? We’re still finalizing our competitors, but I can tell you that the field is broad and includes a number of classic costume dramas as well as some films you may not even have heard of.

When it starts

I’ll announce the field of competitors on Sunday, March 10. The first round of voting begins on Wednesday, March 13, and continues from there, leading up to the Championship Vote on Saturday, March 30.

Mark your calendars, put on your voting hats, and get ready to argue for your favorites!

I need a montage.

23 Feb

After a long, terrible week (last week) and a desperately needed vacation, I finally got back around to sewing. As of yesterday. What have I accomplished? Well, I made some lacing strips, and I cut out the pieces of my corset. Then I realized I would have to get boning from the hardware store before I could go any further (…farther?) in the corset-making process, and I have to have the corset done before I work on the bodice or the pants so I can make sure they fit, and rather than whipping up a second shirt, like I should be doing, I decided to order trim and blog while I watch Willow, which is one of my favorite movies and if you say anything negative about it I will eat your heart in the marketplace. Despite the lingering sense of looming deadlines, I’m having a pretty good time procrastinating.

But all this procrastination is making me think. I really am getting close to the wire. Opening weekend is less than six weeks away, and I’d rather not be sewing at two in the morning the night before, ya know? I mean, not again; that gets really old. But I really, really hate sewing, and I have so much to do. If only my life had a montage option, I would get so much more accomplished.

So in lieu of being able to speed up the unpleasant parts of my life, and in the spirit of being on a deadline, let’s stop sewing and watch some montages, bitches!

And naturally, a sewing montage:

Writing poetry is more fun than making corsets

12 Feb

Staring at pattern/for STUPID  FUCKING corset/Shit guys, my head hurts.

Someone tell me, please/because I don’t fucking know/how do I do this?

Help me help me help/I am going to fuck this up/again. Like last time.

There once was a lady from Spain*
Who found corset-making a pain.
Of it she soon tired,
so she set it a-fire,
and never tried sewing again.

*I am not really from Spain, but it’s easier to rhyme than “Georgia”

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